Jashin's Most Perfect
by Croutonic Sarcasm
Summary: Sasori dies, leaving Deidara to cope without his Danna. Poor Deidara is all alone...who but the Jashinist could make Deidara feel better? Exactly. One-shot, yaoi, rated for Hidan's mouth


Author's Note: Yay! A SasoDei and HiDei fanfic. The idea just popped in my head out of nowhere. ^^ So, read on, my lovely readers! I've got virtual cookies for reviewers, too!

Naruto isn't mine, blah blah blah, you know the deal.

Jashin's Most Perfect

Deidara looked up from his cley sculpture as Sasori walked in his room. "Sasori-danna! Hi, un." He smiled at his partner, the blond's goofy smile meeting a miniscule change of expression in Sasori's face. But Deidara knew Sasori, it was his equivalent of a smile. Deidara wiped his hands off on a nearby towel, getting the tan clay all over the once white cloth.

"I'm leaving for a mission, brat. Leader-sama says you are to accompany me, as per usual," Sasori said, his expression returning to its natural, stoic state. The blond's smile faltered, and he tilted his head. The bangs in front of his eye moved dramatically, the window behind Deidara lighting him up from behind and sillhoeting him.

"What mission?" He asked, sidling up to his lover, putting his arm around Sasori's waist. The cloak Deidara wore was bulky and in the way. Deidara wanted it off. Sasori acted as if Deidara hadn't done that, his voice still calm and measured.

"To get the Ichibi from Suna." Deidara nodded, putting another arm around Sasori's waist, encircling him and pressing himself against Sasori tightly, glad that Sasori was out of his Hiruko puppet for once.

"Alright," He agreed readily, gazing at the slightly shorter redhead. "Do we have a little time before we go?" Deidara asked with a small pout. "We haven't had any time to ourselves for a while, yeah."

"Very well," Sasori said, closing the door behind himself and turning the lock, effectively confining them inside. Of course, that's what Deidara wanted, them alone, nobody else. Deidara didn't look at anyone else the way he looked at Sasori. He was Sasori's, what need had he of anyone else? The loudest sound that was heard after that was a loud moan of "_Danna!_"

_After the Mission_

Deidara stared sightlessly at the ground, a single tear winding its way down his face. Sasori no danna...was gone. That should be impossible. It was Sasori! He was a puppet, for God's sake! Deidara listened to Leader as he explained what happened, the rest of the Akatsuki gathered in the ritual sealing cave. They all looked at Deidara, some sadly, some not caring, one wanting to comfort him.

Deidara sniffled repeatedly, trying to keep the tears from flowing down his face. He was a man, and he couldn't cry. He would be teased later, especially by Hidan. Hidan, that ass. He always called Deidara a girl and other assorted insults, depending upon the day's mood. They were usually more vehement on a Jashin Sacrifice Day, (at least once a week) but he was always hurtful.

Soon, all the members besides Deidara and Hidan left. The two, along with Kakuzu, had been the only to actually arrive there physically, and not just in shadowy clones. Hidan walked over to Deidara, who faced towards the wall to hide his face. Deidara, because he thought he was alone, let the tears fall as they may, a minature waterfall of sadness.

Hidan may be a bit of an ass, well, he might be an ass nearly all the time, but he knew when to stop. He had been married before, anyway, though his wife had been killed. He hadn't been strong enough to protect her. So, he'd become a Jashinist in the hopes of becoming stronger, so that if he ever cared for someone else again, he would be able to protect her (or him, Jashin was cool with both).

Hidan acted worse to Deidara for a reason though. He liked him. He would listen to the man talk endlessly about art ('Art is a bang, un!') but not interrupt. Deidara needed someone to talk to, and hell if Sasori listened. The asinine redhead hadn't even really cared. He just used Deidara to have a good time. And while Hidan's hiding behind tough words may seem childish, he was afraid. Yes, Hidan, afraid. He was afraid he'd be with someone and that precious person died. Hidan was just that type.

Hidan walked up to Deidara, stopping at his side and seeing the tears roll down his face. Hidan blinked; Deidara always passed himself off as being extra tough, never showing any expressive emotions because he'd been made fun of so much.

"Deidara?" Hidan asked softly. Hidan, while he may have a rough and tumble exterior, was a romantic at heart. He was the type to be cute and do adorable things for his partner. He was the perfect romantic for somebody helpless. Kind of like Deidara.

Deidara ignored Hidan, though it wasn't on purpose. He was just so...lost. Quite the feeling of lonliness. He turned to see Hidan, eyes empty and blank. He didn't speak, but his eyes were filled with so much pain it almost made Hidan recoil.

Hidan let his usual smartass grin drop, taking on a look of concern. "Deidara? Will you be alright?" Even in this time of mourning, Hidan couldn't help but notice how Deidara's expressive eyes caught the light just so, shining like the moon on a peaceful lake, or how Deidara's lips just begged for others to cover them.

Hidan put an arm out hesitantly, drawing closer to Deidara after setting down his scythe. "Deidara," He said softly, "It'll be alright." He brought Deidara into an embrace, burying his face in Deidara's sweet smelling hair.

Deidara stiffened for a moment. This wasn't Sasori no danna! No, but... Sasori was dead. A moment later, Deidara held Hidan in a tight hug, taking comfort from the only person to offer it, crying silently into his shoulder.

Hidan run his hand through Deidara's blond locks, his own slicked, silver-white hair not even coming out of place. "It'll be alright..."

_A few months later_

Deidara was calmer, more like his usual self now. Hidan had calmed him down and a little later, Deidara had come to his bed, just for sleep. Hidan thought it was because Deidara had gotten used to sharing a bed with Sasori and just needed another strong presence to feel safe enough to sleep. The first few times Deidara had come into his room, Deidara claimed it was because he was cold, and they would just snuggle tightly. Hidan was patient, and felt no need to rush the upset blond. He would wait as long as necessary. After all, he was immortal anyway. He had time to spare.

Soon, though, Deidara and turned to Hidan in the night and looked at the older man. He let his hand trace over Hidan's features, Hidan did not comment, but his purple eyes watched carefully. Deidara moved closer and placed a small kiss on Hidan's lips, turning a very light rose color. After that, however, there was nothing more and Deidara had stopped spending his nights with Hidan, much to Hidan's displeasure. For the life of Hidan, though, Hidan couldn't figure it out. Wouldn't Deidara WANT comfort, even if it was just Hidan holding him tightly?

Apparently not, because Deidara spent most of his time honing his use of his bombs, creating new, more powerful jutsu. Hidan watched from the window with a frown, then shook his head and went outside to greet Deidara. The midday sun was bright and sunlit, very cheery and happy. As Hidan drew closer to Deidara, though, Deidara's mumbling turned out to be self-deprecating and pessimistic. "I'll never get it right, un, Danna was right, maybe I'm all wrong about art..." He said with a sigh.

Hidan scowled. That stupid puppet had made Deidara doubt himself constantly. Deidara had looked up to Sasori far too much. "I think your art kicks ass." Hidan said with his usual smirk in place. He wore just his pants, the cloak and scythe in the headquarters a few dozen yards away in his room. They were in a forest in the middle of nowhere, so they all relaxed here, meaning Hidan didn't carry that heavy weapon around everywhere.

Deidara looked up from a small bird sculture he was creating on the ground, his head whipping up in a flurry of blond hair. He stared for a moment, then flushed red. "O-oh?" He gave a nervous smile. "Th-thanks, yeah." He said, his visible eye looking everywhere but at Hidan. Hidan frowned, noticing the other's nervousness.

"Something wrong, Blondie?" Deidara winced at the term and Hidan's eyes narrowed slightly, walking closer to Deidara. _Maybe I shouldn't say that._ Hidan thought, having seen the wince.

"N-no, un." Deidara lied. Hidan may not be the brightest, but he could tell when people were lying. This ability was honed from being forced to work with Kakuzu and having to rely on body language as he couldn't exactly see all of Kakuzu's expression and Kakuzu was a man of few words.

Hidan walked a little closer, squatting down to be at Deidara's eye level and tilting his head. "You're lying through your fucking teeth." He said matter-of-factly. Deidara shook his head in furious rebuttal.

"No, no! I'm not!" The blond said, attempting to return working on his sculpture. As he made his hand-mouths lick along the side of the clay creation, the wing of the bird fell off as he accidentally moved too harshly, flustered due to Hidan's presence.

Hidan frowned and picked the small wing up. It was just bigger than his hand. He proffered it to Deidara, who stared at it. After a minute, he looked like he'd made up his mind, a very unhappy look on his face, and knocked it out of Hidan's hand. The clay flew for a good five feet to land in a mess of clay. Deidara sniffled, looking ready to cry.

"I can't do it, yeah!" He slapped the ground suddenly, making Hidan jump. "I just can't!" His voice broke and a tear wound down his face.

Hidan was startled by Deidara's quick change, but didn't do anything. He had NO idea what Deidara was talking about. "Deida-?" He began, but was cut off by Deidara's next words.

"It's an insult to Danna's memory, un!" The blond jumped to his feet and ran off, leaving a very confused Hidan with the bird. He stared after Deidara, watching him run inside the hideout and slam the door after himself. He didn't avert his gaze for a long while. Eventually, Hidan looked back to the mutilated bird. In a fit of generosity, he picked up the wing and attempted to reform it. It was a crude mockery of Deidara's smooth lines, but it was serviceable and could be worse. He reattached it to the bird with a little spit to soften it and smooth the edges on neatly, then picked it up and headed to Deidara's room. He was going to make Deidara cough up the truth.

In no time, Hidan was balancing the bird carefully with his right hand, the left rapping on Deidara's door. After an eternity, Deidara finally opened the door with a jark. "What do yo- Oh..." Deidara began angrily, but stopped upon realizing it was the silver-haired Jashinist.

Hidan held up the bird in offering. "I tried fixing the damn thing, but it's not nearly like you do..." He said, hoping Deidara wouldn't take it as an insult. Hidan, though he didn't realize it, was flushing a pale rose. Deidara mirrored him, turning a light red. Hidan's actions were so...thoughtful and kind of sweet. Deidara couldn't help but think that Sasori would never do something like that.

"It's alright, yeah." He hesitated, thinking, then stepped back and opened the door further, an invitation inside. Hidan had never seen inside Deidara's room, so he leapt on the chance. He went inside, setting the clay creature on a scrupulously clean dresser. The whole room was meticulously clean, actually. There was no clay anywhere, just a faint scent of earth. Hidan turned to face Deidara, whose face was unreadable. There were so many emotions in his gaze that it nearly made Hidan start.

"So," Hidan said with what he hoped was a confident grin, though it was more nervous, as he sat down on the bed. "What would be an insult to the fucking puppet's memory?" Deidara's face grew melancholy at Hidan's easy insult to Sasori, having recovered his mood but it threatened to crack again at mention of the puppeteer.

"Nothing." Deidara looked away, walking to the clay bird and attempting to smooth Hidan's fix. Hidan sighed, a bit tired of the dodging act.

"Aw, come on, Blondie--" Another wince "--tell me, why don't you?" Hidan asked, sitting on the white sheeted bed comfortably, then laid down, hands under his head and feet flat on the floor, hands folded under his head like a pillow.

"It's nothing, un." Deidara's voice was unusally sharp, and Hidan cracked his lavender eyes open. _Obviously it's something..._ He thought. Hidan sat up, pausing for a moment. _Should I?_ _... Yeah. Its my only chance._ He stood up and came close to Deidara, hesitating for another moment, then slipped his arms around the blond's waist. Deidara gasped, eyes getting wide, but he didn't push Hidan off. When Hidan spoke again, his mouth was a mere inch from Deidara's ear, the air ghosting over the shell of the blond's ear and raising goosebumps on Deidara's neck. "Deidara, tell me..." He said, voice soft and pleading.

Deidara took in a shaky breath, then whirled around in Hidan's embrace, sapphire eye flashing fire. He put his hands on Hidan's chest, then pushed. "Off, un." Hidan didn't relinquish his grip, but he did give Deidara more room.

"No." Hidan smiled and leaned his head down to meet his lips with Deidara's. It was just as he had imagined, Deidara's lips were so soft. Deidara wasn't responding though. _I'll fix that..._ Hidan thought with a mental smirk. He ran his tongue along Deidara's lower lip, asking entrance into the other's mouth silently. Deidara gasped, giving Hidan the entrance he needed. He pushed inside, touching Deidara's tongue lightly until the blond began to kiss him back, though his entire frame shook. Deidara put his arms around Hidan's neck, pulling him closer with a soft moan, then seemed to realize what he had just done.

He shoved Hidan away, wiping his lips clean with the back of his hand, leaving Hidan holding thin air. Hidan blinked a few times in rapid succesion, then glanced to Deidara, confused. "No, un!" Deidara said emphatically, shaking his head. "No, no, no, no!" He sounded liked he was trying convince himself. "I can't, yeah! It insults Danna's memory!" _So that's what he meant._ Hidan thought, glad he understood, but also sad. Deidara was still devoted to the puppetmaster, even after Sasori was dead.

"No, Deidara, it's not." He said, his voice silky. Hidan, when he wanted to be, could be very alluring and charming. If he was given the right chance and opportunity, he'd shine as a true romantic. These times are few and far inbetween, so it was rare, but this was one of those times. He came close to Deidara, who was holding himself with his arms, and ran a hand down Deidara's cheek, holding his chin lightly. Hidan pulled on Deidara's chin, feeling slight resistance that quickly gave, to look up and meet Hidan's gaze.

"Deidara, he wouldn't want you to be sad all the time." Hidan said, the words leaving a bad taste in his mouth. He was actually talking about Sasori in a _good_ way and he hated it, but it would help Deidara move on. It had been a while anyway. Deidara needed to move on, and if Hidan speaking of Sasori positively would do it, then he'd talk about Sasori like the man had been perfect.

"Deidara...You know it's true..." Hidan said softly, giving a gentle pull on Deidara's chin to tilt it up, Hidan's smile dazzling. It helped that the silver-haired man wasn't cursing. In this situation, Hidan knew better than to let the swear words leave his lips, because sometimes, being all smartass doesn't do anything but cause a lot of trouble. Deidara looked confused for a moment, his unhidden eye filling with tears, but they did not fall.

Deidara's gaze dropped. Hidan was right, but...but it was still too soon, right? Danna had only been dead a few months, not even a year. Deidara shouldn't care about Hidan, he shouldn't. The Jashinist was psychotic and may decide one day to try sacrificng him for his precious Jashin-sama. Deidara bit his lip, worrying at it as he tried to decide.

Hidan watched fairly patiently, but when Deidara's teeth made his lip bleed, he couldn't stop himself. He released Deidara's chin and leaned forward to lick the blood away softly. "Deidara..." He said softly, violet hues looking worried. A moment later, he shook his head. Obviously Deidara didn't want him and Hidan wasn't gonig to force himself upon Deidara. He went to move away from Deidara, releasing him, but the blond didn't let go of Hidan's neck, interlacing his fingers to stop Hidan from leaving him.

"It wouldn't be wrong, un?" Deidara asked, but sounding like his very life depended on the answer, still gazing at the ground sightlessly.

Hidan shook his head, returning his hands to Deidara's waist. "No, Deidara, it wouldn't be. I swear it to Lord Jashin himself." Silence regined for a good amount of time, then finally, Deidara looked up.

"Good..." He murmured, then went on tip-toe to kiss Hidan chastely. Hidan caught the back of Deidara's head, though, his fingers moving in the soft blond locks like water, and brought Deidara back up for another kiss, this time more emotional and passionate.

After they broke apart to breathe, Deidara was flushed scarlet, and Hidan was red too, but not to the point that Deidara was. Hidan bit his own lip, trying to figure out how to word his feelings. He really cared about Deidara, always had since he had first joined the Akatsuki and set eyes on the gorgeous blond, but Sasori had made his claim clear from the get-go. Hidan really cared...no, he...loved Deidara. He did. Hidan wasn't one really to think so grandly or hugely impacting, but it was true. Hidan had joined a few years back, and he had fallen for the little blond head over heels. Deidara was just perfect, his explosive temper along with a easy-going attitude capturing Hidan's attention like no other. Deidara was very attractive too, and Hidan couldn't get over the fact that right now, for this moment, he held Jashin's most perfect creation in his arms.

Hidan smiled at Deidara, having quit biting his lip. _I'll say it when he's ready._ He decided, content with his decision. After all, not like they were going to die soon anyway. Hidan was immortal, and he would protect Deidara til the day he died, and then, Hidan would simply wait until Jashin chose to grace him with the bliss of death so he could be with Deidara once more.

_Because I love you, my little explosive blond, and I always will._


End file.
